Body Language of Attraction: Some Useful Tips

Posted on May 28, 2009 @ 4:57 am
by Desmond Ray

Look at me: I gotta case of body language, Freddie Mercury / Queen

How to flirt with your body? Human communication conveys 7% of information through the meaning of words, 38% of information is passed through intonation and pace of speech, and 55% of information is admitted only with the aid of mimics and gestures. So that is the case of body language. How can we use it in order to understand the others and being understood? How can we arouse an interest in another person by using body language? Freddie got it right: this is a language for eyes, not ears.

Looking in the eyes. When we are engaged in a business conversation, we are usually focused, and it feels like we are looking straight into the eyes of our counterpart. In reality our eyes cannot stay fixed, they scan the face of a person along a tight closed path: left eye - middle space - right eye, and so on. When we are more relaxed, like, for example, we are talking with a friend, eyes still follow the cyclic path, but it is not that tight anymore. Our eyes scanning his (or her) face along an upset triangle with a base slightly below the eye-line and the vertex at the person mouth.

A joyful, flirting chattering makes the eye scan area even wider. This time, especially if any sexual interest is present, the center of the area will be at the lips of the person you are talking with. So, if a person you are talking to seemingly cannot lift his (or her) eyes from your lips, you better know this person is likely already kissing you in his (or her) imagination. How far you want to proceed in reality will be now up to you, since you already got the signals.

Do it as I do. What makes a difference between light flirting and strong desire in a body language terms? If you are really want to get involved with him or her, mimic the object of your desire. When someone behaves similarly to us, we conclude that we have a lot in common with that person. Of course, avoid imitating any negative features of this person, because such mimicking will easily turn into a mockery. In other words, mimic must be moderate, total copycatting will not do any good for you. Even if you are copying the gestures of a person, always take a minute pause before you do your part.

Move your eyebrows. Did you know that if you lift your eyebrows when you meet a person for the first time it will be a sign of friendliness toward that person. If the feeling is mutual: you will get the same up-down motion of eyebrows in response. It looks funny from the side, especially if one of you has bushy eyebrows, it will look as if one cannot see the other clearly through them. But this is one of the oldest ways of winning sympathy (who knows how many thousands of generations of cave men used this trick before actual language was invented)? Now, when you know, you can use it!

Where the eyesight rests. By watching (even secretly) somebodys hands and legs (postures and motion), we are revealing our interest toward the person. So, if you would notice that someone is watching with interest your hands, legs, feet, be assured, there is some interest. If you, after noticing such attention, will approach that person, this will tell that you have an interest too. At such moment it may be a good time to use spoken language: you will be heard!

Wink me back! Have you ever exchanged winks with someone? Wink is a sign of an interest and attraction. No surprise that it is used in the dating networks as an invitation for a chat. Same is in the offline world. If you see someone who is interesting to you, wink her (him). Got wink in reply? Start talking.

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